Parenting « JEWELLE TAN

Dining Out In Peace

Filed in Family | My Daughters | Parenting 2 Comments

I have taken to carrying a bunch of pencils, pens and coloured pen plus papers in my handbag to whip out when we are eating out.

All for the kids of course.

They are useful to stop my 6-year-old from doing her interrogate-the-waitresses routine. Stop the 3-year-old from dancing all around. And so the 8-year-old will just be quiet for a while.

All so that we can dine without being notice.

This do-some-drawings trick does make them focus on their papers (and not their surroundings) most of the times except that it also comes with “Mama, look at my drawing!” or “What do you think of this fashion?” or always the loudest, “PAPA, CAN YOU DRAW ME A SPORTS CAR!!”

But how primitive we look when parents in nearby tables whip out fancy gadgets to entertain their kids. How provincial we seem when their full-of-self-control kids quietly (and smugly) swipe their fingers on their gadgets – when all we had were short wooden pencils and coloured pens with wrong caps!

I know what my kids must be thinking….

Yes, mama will bring fancier looking pencils and make sure all coloured pens have the correct caps on!

09Apr

Making Kids Enjoy Books

Filed in Brunei Life | Family | My Daughters | Parenting Leave a comment

I am the kind of mother who spends on books for my children more than anything else – not clothes, not shoes and especially not toys.

So they are used to having books around them.

In nearly every part of our unit within our family home, I kept shelves of books for them to flip through at any time.

And it makes me happy albeit a little stressful when my 8-year-old gravely informed me that she has finished reading a book I bought just a few hours earlier and asked “Could we go to the book store again?“

It makes me happy to catch my usually hurricane-in-movement-and-typhoon-in-sound of a 6-year-old sitting quietly on the couch, flipping through a huge book, declaring “I love this! There are so many stories here!“

It makes me happy when my 3-year-old told me that she was “Drawing AND reading, of course!” when asked why was she being so quiet in the living room.

Contrary to what many people think, it is not hard to make kids enjoy books. Just put books all over the house and watch them pick it up.

03Feb

Transporting Babies The Practical Way

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I note with interest how many mothers (especially among celebrities) these days that are reviving the natural way of carrying or moving their babies or young kids around.

No longer do these modern mothers (and fathers) rely strictly on what most of us used exclusively all these years – pushable vehicles such as the strollers, prams and the travel systems.

Of course, no longer do these moms use any everyday sarongs to wrap their babies in and neither do they simply tied these slings in the crudest of ways just as long as the knots are tight.

These days, modern moms are spoilt with the choices of beautiful fabrics to use and ordinary knots just will not do. There will be rings and the such that these baby carriers are easily an attractive accessory of any fashion-conscious mom.

But as attractive as these baby slings may be, I will still go for pushable vehicles such as the UppAbaby Vista stroller because with 3 young kids, I know the necessity of having the squirmiest child safe and secured for times when both my hands need to be free to deal with the other two.

Besides when it comes to photos of new-age celebrity moms with baby slings – don’t think there are no nannies pushing the strollers walking close by.

* Photo Source

30Dec

Christmas Expectations

Filed in Parenting | Thoughts Leave a comment

There was a site that posted disappointed/angry/annoyed Facebook statuses of people who did not get their desired Christmas presents – expensive electronic gadgets and even cars!

How sad that it has become simply a time to demand and expect specific items.

How stressful it must be for people in this kind of community and mentality to face Christmas – knowing that certain expensive things are expected.

How did it become to materialistic?

Perhaps it all started with the simple and innocent question asked to small kids, “What would you like for Christmas?“

Growing up with this kind of expectation, it can easily turn from “A Barbie!” to “A purple bicycle!” to “A white iPhone!” – with the list becoming more exclusive and expensive by the year.

In some ways, it is good training for kids to demand and be more assertive with what they want.

But good training or not, my kids are not asked what they wanted and they were happy with whatever they received – stationery, t-shirts, books, hair accessories and etc.

And they mostly enjoyed being with the whole family and that is what Christmas should be about.

09Apr

Competitive Moms

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One thing I like about my daughters’ school is the competitive spirit among the mothers.

Not competing in the ways of whose kids were taken for the best school holiday trips or being women, who looked like they are ambassadors of programs like click here or sported the most expensive handbags as they walked their kids to class.

But competitive in making the most of the opportunities offered by the schools for their kids.

Just yesterday, a fellow mom updated me on where to get the materials for a competition. That reminded me of this competition which I was actually trying to forget. Another mom told me that her daughter has completed hers and advised me to get mine started on hers soon. That reminded me that I should not let my daughter miss out on this activity just because it involves a lot of helping out from my side!

For my other daughter, another set of mothers reminded me how important it is to grab whatever learning opportunities are available. A fellow mom confided how she regretted not pushing her daughter for one activity at the time when she saw that mine was involved in two.

But it was one mom words I bring up to mind whenever I feel overwhelmed with all the demands of getting my two school-going children to be exposed to as many learning experiences – which meant a lot of driving to and fro school, coming in early to get a parking spot and most times hanging around in school for hours.

“Telan saja” or just accept whatever inconveniences there are, for their sake and for their future.

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