JEWELLE TAN

A few friends are expecting their bundle of joy soon.

One has already started her maternity leave and judging from on how regular her blog is now updated, we can safely assume that she is having a little too much time in hand since she is used to the busy life of a career mom.

But I enjoyed reading her latest post on her baby wish-list. I am especially keen on the portable rocking chair although the price is a bit too steep for my liking. As for the other stuffs, as I told her we are a family of hands-me-down-and-waste-it-not so we are proud of the fact that many of our baby items have been used by my all of my kids (those that have not been destroyed by them, that is).

Baby walkers, porridge thermos, baby crib, baby blankets are handed down from my eldest and are now used by my youngest.

In fact, the most expensive spending we made so far, in regards to the kids, were their delivery as I had all of them in a private clinic although I had my regular check-ups in the government clinics where I did not have to spend on organic prenatal vitamins.

Let’s hope that the next big spending would be when we pack them off to universities.

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Reading this news article on “Concern over video games“, it reminded of the times when we used to call electronic games, “game and watch”.

When I was in upper primary school, we used to have a neighbour friend who has one of this cool gadget. Despite his sometimes annoying attitude, we remained civil to him because of this - which he’d sometimes lent to us when he was in the right mood.

My parents certainly never got this or any of those gaming gadget for me but I don’t miss not having them. There were too many other things to do!

My childhood was spent mostly outdoors. Walking for miles, exploring places - which when I think back gave me the goosebumps. I had so much freedom and I could only do what I did because I lived in safe places, in a safe time.

Unfortunately, my girls will not get to experience all those that I did - because even though we still live in a safe place, times are different and I can’t even let them play outside the house without supervision and imagination running wild.

Still, I’d rather they do more physical exploring - than having them glued to the monitor or TV.

So even though they’d love to have this kind of game and no matter what kind of benefits this kind of entertainment gadget afforded, they will not be getting any video game any time soon.

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One of the most aggravating memory I had when I gave birth to Eu 5 years ago was the conversation I had with the Paediatrician at the clinic where I delivered her.

“Is there anyone who can help you check if the baby turns yellow?“

Perhaps I looked blank - as anyone would I think when ask such a dumb question - that he repeated his question with an annoyed tone. The first of his many ways that say only one thing - poor people skill.

Needless to say, I was glad when the clinic engaged another Paediatrician who is not only kind and patient that the kids absolutely liked her.

But the point is of this post is - jaundice.

Recently I came to know of a few friends whose babies came down with jaundice after birth. And I thought for the benefit of other expecting mothers who might not know of this method, I would like to share my mother’s tip to prevent jaundice.

I have never asked her where she learn this technique from but thanks to her, none of my children had jaundice.

And her tip is the leaves of the noni tree or mengkudu.

When I was expecting Eu, she had some mengkudu bush growing in her garden as that was also the time when everyone was raving about the health benefits of this fruit.

All she did was boil the leaves and used the cooled water to bath my girls - specifically to prevent jaundice.

I cannot promise that this is a guaranteed way but it worked for my girls so perhaps it is worth a try. By the way, she also bought a lot of herbs to bath the girls with - and one of the most interesting one was what the Chinese physician claimed will ensure that the girls never get any pimples!

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A few weeks ago, I overheard my daughter Qi said in response to something that her sister was saying.

“Then I will marry my own Prince Charming!”

Qi, my coming-to-ONLY-3-years-old daughter is glibly talking about Prince Charming and marriage!

Non-mothers might not know it but I think parents of other young daughters are having the same experience right now.

Our girls are going mad about all these Disney Princesses!

Perhaps the rage for the Disney Princesses started when a magazine called Princess was published. So far I managed to limit my girls to only three issues because one issue cost nearly $5 and reading material of this kind does not last long in our household.

However I know of other parents who buy every issues and last month when my husband and his friends went to Singapore, I was amused to learn that I was not the only wife who told my husband to get the latest issue.

The men failed but one wife got the coveted issue from Kuala Lumpur!

Both my daughters know every single one of the Disney Princesses although they’ve only watch “Beauty & The Beast” and a little bit of the “Sleeping Beauty” which we bought only last weekend.

When it comes to drawing, my daughter Eu draws nothing else but Princess pictures - with Aurora from the Sleeping Beauty being her most favorite subject.

They regularly paraded around the house with my mother in law’s old sleeping coats as their princess gowns, announced themselves as the princess-of-the-week and demanded that everyone else addressed them as such.

And we have had a “Belle”, “Ariel” and of course “Aurora” over the last several months.

Qi however is less princess-y and she assumed both the princess and the villain. More often than not, she preferred to be the “Wicked Witch” or “Wicked Queen” and lately, the “Evil Stepmother”.

And it’s not only the kids who are sucked into this. Mothers including myself are equally “in love” with these beautiful characters and it is only the question of cost that stopped me from decorating their room with Princess theme (except cheap stickers and posters from the magazines).

So, how Disney Princess-crazy are you?

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When I tell others that I get my kids ready to be in bed by 8 pm, the usual reactions would be “Why so early? or “Let them play a while more!”.

And when I hear parents who say “They will sleep when they are sleepy” and whose small kids stay up beyond 10 pm or even more interesting, as one parent told me, “Sometimes we sleep earlier than him (their 4 years old son)”, I can only say that these parents must have tremendous amount of patience - which I clearly do NOT have!

Because although it’s supposedly good to get kids to sleep no later than 8pm, my kids are sent to bed early more for my sanity.

We’ve trained Eu (4 years old now) since she was a few months old and Qi (2 years old now) since she was born that by 8 pm, it is bedtime. It used to be as early as 5pm for Qi when she was an infant but we’ve adjusted the time gradually as they grew older.

And if you’re one of those who’d ask me “WHY!” - here’s my reasons.

Peace Time For ME

I try to go to bed no later than 11 pm and having a few hours to myself when they are in bed is a godsend.

I cannot imagine how some working moms do it - coming back from a full day work and having to endure several more hours of chaos before they can have some peace and quiet.

Peace Time For My SPOUSE

It is only fair that my husband should get a few hours at home to relax after he comes back from work - after a reasonable time spent with the kids of course. And this is even more important if he works in a stressful environment.

I do know of some non-working wives who think that as soon as their husbands are home from work, they should look after the kids - when they could just be sent to bed and get everyone the rest that they deserve.

Peace Time For US

Perhaps because we are careful with what to say to each other when we’re around the kids that we look forward to the few hours at the end of the day when it’s just the two of us and we can let our guards down.

We can chat, tell naughty jokes, discuss or even argue without being judged by the kids.

Or being able to enjoy the silence as we sit and read together.

Or having the luxury of eating midnight supper without a “Can I have some!” by one of the kids.

Of course, different parents have different standard to what is a healthy family environment.

This post is not to judge parents whose idea of suitable bedtime for small kids is opposite to ours - we as parents make our own decisions on what is right or wrong and important or irrelevant that are right for our lifestyle and personality.

This post is meant to share, from our own personal perspectives, that if parents can train their kids to sleep early, it is actually good the parents themselves.

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